“Big-She-Crazy-Me” Unafraid in the Astral !

As I have already mentioned in my other posts, my out of body experiences, especially the first ones, were no bed of roses. Reading my journal posts may even feel altogether terrifying. Well, after all, I was being attacked most of the times by not very friendly or benevolent entities, right? And if it had been a movie (horror movie for sure!) I would probably be squirming in my seat almost all of the time!

But not `SHE`!! This `she` who is `me`, this she/me in the astral would take no b…t, not for a second.
She would even go further and challenge these unfriendly entities out, and eventually have `energy fights` with them, or at other times she would try to enticingly talk to them about taking them to the Light, or at other times again she would say, rather shout, inspiring words to them such as `Love is God ` !!

In waking up, I could never believe my audacity `in there`! Nonetheless both the insane challenges and the beautiful statements of Love never failed to blow my mind away!
Was I really saying those things? Was I really doing those things? How could she be really me … and yet she was! I just couldn’t wrap my scattered brains around the fact that this she/me in there was always so strong, so fearless, and yes, courageous almost to the point of recklessness.

I started calling her the Big/She/Crazy/Me, because that was the only definition that could come close to describing her.
There was this huge gap between the she/me in there, and the little me in the awake/normal world. For truly inexplicable reasons, she never seemed to be afraid of what, according to my saner and more sensible little self ( 🙂 ), she should. She simply seemed to know that these `things` had no power over her.

And how can I explain this … in a way, it always felt like she was on a true mission that I didn’t seem to understand well. But I owe her a lot, actually I owe her more than I could ever say; the fact that she always remained focused and not scared at all by these inexplicable attacks really saved my mind.
And I truly mean this. You see, this kind of experiences, if they become extreme, as they became for me in 2007 during an illness that left me bed-ridden for three months, can really lead to mental insanity.

2007 was actually my fourth year of out of body experiences, although I didn`t understand what they were yet (and although, mind you!, not all OBEs are scary experiences!!). And in that summer I found myself in desperate need for help. Possibly because of my illness and subsequent low physical energy, I really can’t say for sure, my OBEs became uncontrollable and full of bullying attacks, like every night and of the spookiest sort. And for the first and only time Big/She/Crazy/Me seemed not to be able to cope too well. (and I will talk about this in more details in future posts; it needs to be talked about)

Honestly, if I had not had my family and my spiritual beliefs to support and anchor me, it could have really proved to be more than my mind could endure. Of course the best help and quickest solution would have been to have somebody explain it to me. But I didn’t have that good fortune until 2009.

In point of fact, and I remember this very clearly, one of the first thoughts that crossed my mind during those dreadful three months of astral bully was `Oh! The poor people in the loony!`.
I just couldn’t help thinking how maybe many of the poor people confined to such places could have really been merely hearing and seeing things that others couldn’t, exactly as I was. And I could too easily understand how without support, they may have gone mad. But I was sure I was NOT INSANE. I was sure there was something else going on, something I could not control or understand well enough to logically and rationally explain to others (or to myself for that). But I was a grounded person and I had a sound and no-nonsensical mind, and I absolutely knew I was not a nut case for the mad-house!

Amongst all this, the blessing was that my family, in spite of the fact that they could not of course understand what was really going on, trusted my judgment and helped me recover physically, which turned out to be all I needed for Big/She/Crazy/Me to get back her strength and blow the astral bullies away. And this is not a metaphor! In my first OBE after getting back on my feet, she literally blew them away … from the palm of her hand … a soft blow and they dispersed! It was a glorious day ! 
As strength came back, I found myself able to control my fear better, especially since my best ally, this strong she/me, seemed to be back and thriving again.
From this experience I came to the conclusion that a debilitated and weak physical self does not help in the astral. But I may be totally wrong here, and it may be different for each person.

Well, fear cannot be erased totally in one stroke, but with the passing of years and the gathering of more knowledge it did gradually subside. I became more confident and more used to the astral phenomena and, most of all, I took part in one of William Buhlman`s workshops, and that made a huge difference. I finally understood what was happening, and knew what to do ! Knowledge is power indeed.

One last but important consideration before closing is that, beside the help of my family, one really BIG element played a great part in helping me stay sane and overcome fear during those experiences. It was this strong sense of spirituality, profound spirituality that, despite all, I could feel present there, although it eluded me in its greatness. And I will be talking about this for sure in my next posts. It is a huge and often underrated and maybe not enough appreciated aspect of the OOB experience.

Click on the image to read about Foal and the Angels on Amazon.

Foal and the Angels

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8 comments on ““Big-She-Crazy-Me” Unafraid in the Astral !

  1. Fascinating. I, too, have a different personality much of the time during my OBEs and lucid dreams. I used to call her a Chimp, because the behavior is so much like a chimpanzee compared to my day to day consciousness. She is very reactive. Extremely. Impulsive. And childish. Which I am not proud of. Throughout my life there have been many incidents of me flying above people shouting “Neener neener neener, You can’t fly like *I* can!” sort of shouts. I have also sworn a lot at the invisible force that would often “take” me through mysterious, symbolic lessons that I didn’t ask for or understand. Only in retrospect do I find that I was quite possibly saying “F*#$ You!” to a spirit guide!!!

    I only wish my other personality was as wise as yours, enough to shout phrases of love to the bullies. I only accomplished this once. I just sent love from my heart to the negative energies and they were so repelled by it they left the room. It was liberating.

    • Thank you Laura for your comment ! i love it ! i love the CHIMP !!! it feels as a very FREE and uninhibited personality ! and its so good for me to know that there is a sort of change of personality for other people too.
      I wonder if the she/me in there is always wise, though !! sometimes she freaks me out ( and by the way, I have almost finished a new post just about this 🙂 ) .
      The sending Love worked out for me too, but not always. Once i was `sent back` so much …malevolence (its the only word that comes to mind) that it scared me , but really got Big/She mad ! lol
      I would love to hear more about your adventures and experiences in the astral.
      Do you talk about them in a blog ? THANKS AGAIN for taking the time to comment !

  2. I have been working on a website for the last few months, ever since I met my son (in utero) for the second time. I was so moved by the experience I decided it was time to share with the world! My goal is to have it published by the first, symbolic of beginning the new year as honestly as possible. But we will see if it’s ready by then. I don’t think I’ll ever have perfected it enough to where I feel like I’m covering everything or saying everything I need to say. But I also gotta stop trying to be perfect; I’m far from it! I still haven’t perused your different pages on your blog, will have to do that when I get a chance! Thanks for being an inspiration, Lory. ❤ And for always being honest about your experiences. These are the kind of experiences I love to read!

  3. What do you mean ? you are writing a book about how you met your not-yet-born son in the astral ??? Well, THAT would be interesting !!! 🙂 I will support you in any little way I can (I am not much of a marketing person myself, but I`ll try to spread the word for sure ).
    And just can`t see how I was an inspiration to you , but thanks ! I am glad to hear it!
    As for my other posts they are all mostly on my dream experiences (and reflections)and OBEs . You can skip the videos, they are not `mine`, but just meant for same-oriented people.
    But I`d love for you to read the rest of my posts, when you have time, and hear your comments.
    And `perfect` is not requested for writing a book !! (if so, i would never have published FOAL 😉 !)

    • Oh no, I’m not writing a book about it! When I say I haven’t published the blog yet it just means that it’s not visible to anyone at this point. I’m just working on it and I will make it visible around the first and begin sharing it.. I met my daughter during the first trimester when I was pregnant with her, and I met my son in the first trimester, but I don’t think I could write a whole book about those experiences. 🙂

      I do hope to write a book someday, if it feels right and I am inspired. Growing up I used to think it would be an OBE ‘How To’ book, but now that I am older and I have read so many ‘How To’ OBE books and they get boring pretty fast, I think I would make it a book about my journey. But who knows!! I still can’t wait to get your book in the mail. I am so excited and so grateful! When I say you are an inspiration, it is because you are sharing your experiences with the world (scary and much needed!) are completely honest about them (refreshing! they are so unique!) and you have published a book! Also, I just plain like you! 🙂

  4. I would have no idea how to write a book on `How to OBE`…i was never able to make them happen when i wanted 🙂 but i guess a book about your journey would be that much more significant, Laura !!
    Thank you for your too kind words, not sure i deserve them, but they do make me happy, a lot !
    and shall be looking forward to your New Year blog post then !
    i never even thought it was possible to meet your child before being born, although i do have witnessed in a dream the baby (in astral form) being close to the head of his delivering mother (just a few minutes before birth, i guess).
    and i could feel how scared he was. this brought me to the conclusion that we are just as afraid to be born, as we are afraid to die

  5. Dear Foal, Just came across this blog of yours by “chance”. Wow, it was so good to know that other people experience these strange attacks that live you full of fear and bloated. Thank God that my body is so strong to take this kind of aggression, but truly sometimes I wonder if my mind can take all this. And no one to talk to about it. When I explain it to my family they right away want to send me to a psyc and get me pills. Where can I find more info about these aggressions ? I just came out of 4 months of terrible nights where my body would be itching from the stuff I was being bombarded with. I am considering moving close to my family (children and grandchildren) for support. When I am near them there are no attacks. I did a lot of energy work on the planet and I think that is the reason. But now I am ready to drop all that. It has been a hard journey and I need time out of the interdimentional strange world. Where can I get more information on this subject? Thank you so much.

    • Dear Merita, i am so glad that you found my Blog site, even if by `chance` (there is no chance in this world, all happens for a reason ! 🙂
      I am very glad to see you here, also because even if you dont seem to know it , we are already FB friends 🙂 !
      i know how frightening it can be, but my guess is that you are having the beginning of out of body experiences. By changing dimensions, we sometimes encounter unpleasant entities, but with experience and by understanding the process better(knowledge dissipates fear !!) all will be well ! i assure you ! no need for pills or medications or shrinks ! it is a totally different phenomenon !
      Maybe this is too public a venue to talk about this, feel free to message me on FB ! will be happy to help if i can !
      sending LOVE ! ❤ BE WELL !! all is good !

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